ok. i've stopped my caveman days.
today i decided to pick my phone n sms.
n wish all my juniors gd luck.
for their chinese exam tmr.
hope they can do well.
but i seriously think i need it more.
n i seriously lack motivation to study.
the study break was wasted.
my results are at stake.

reality sinks deep in.
when i found out there is no one to fall back on.
people are all simply busy with wad they have on hand.
yepp. they do prioritise, but dun expect much frm it.
more occupied wif something else.
may it be studies, ur stead, any other thing.
no one is in the wrong should i say.
but truth is i felt distant from my friends.
or maybe i have no friends.
cuz i could nt even think of who to help me now.
i have not changed. i'm still me.
seriously i have to say sorry to kaingee.
i still dun learn the lesson tt frens come n go.
i may appear intelligent to u.
but too stubborn am i here to understand.

Labels: a rough patch

i haven been blogging for donkey years.
i know tt.
its nt that i dun bother.
its becuz i have no time.
simply i have nt been myself lately.

juz went to bloghop.
went by kaingee's blog.
had a short look at her entry.
i found out i have something similar.
i've the sense of loneliness as well.
all the studying.
i have been locking myself at home.
did i really study all the time?
sad to say no.
i spent alot of time wasting away.
locking myself out of the world outside.
i broke my record.
i have not been msg-ing for days.
n no one bothered to msg me anw.
or its juz qns to ask me.
no one had the time to bother.
i dun know wads happening to ppl arnd me.
neither do anyone bothered to know wads happening to me.
so its vice versa.
so i have to live on.
work on towards the Alevels.
even w/o anyone beside me.

inconfidence n solitude

Labels: new entry

the study break officially started.
now its time to work for the last stretch.
have nt been really working my guts out yet.
so i'm kinda guilty.
friday. celebrated kaingee's bday.
got her a wallet.
n it was time to party!=)
saturday. went desmond's hse.
saw his new friend.so cool luhh.
i dun mean his fren.=/
but to have a fren living under the same roof wif ya.
n his fren was badly pestered.
to socialise wif us! lol.
today. tution lo.
den it was time to work.
but.. i kinda slacked.
did nt do anything constructive.
see my mundane life.=/

LAST official day of school.
before we set off for the final battle, the A levels.
i'm seriously nt prepared to leave jc yet.
two years passed, in a flash.
and now we are facing the fearful As alr.
yepp tons n tons of wonderful memories.
shall take time to mention them.
orientation 1.
my wonderful OG19, best OGLs.
06S22 PAE.
the best class. we rocks!
tons n tons of misses to this class.
loads n loads of memories.
i will always remb tt chalet times.=D
Orientation 2.
many many wonderful experiences.
i really enjoyed the whole process then as an OGL.
06S13, 2006/2007.
this is the class whr i spent my bulk of my jc time wif.
the highly competitive class.
the class full of rumours n laughter.
wif gr8 ppl like edwin(asshole), jit to always talk to.
nt excluding our constant source of laughter, Chingyi.
n the guy tt always suan me, desmond.
clever intelligent ppl like gaelan, eugene n lewis.
our responsible class rep, chris.
the guy tt gals wish for, Jonah!
our macho guy, jiayang.
always nt 4getting gaoda n haodong.
the gals now!
quiet ones: yu wei,shan2,peiying,
studious one: huikim
Noisy ones: MAria. jieying, karin huijuan.
all these ppl form a big portion in my jc life.
u ppl are remembered.
for everything, anything, something=)
loves S13.=)))))))))))))
Orientation1.
OG25! u guys simply rocked my world!
F5 ogls. simply the best.
two simple lines to bring out everything=)


as we walk down to the end of JC life.
i found out that i gained much.
but i lost much too.
the memories gained, experience obtained.
never to be forgotten.
but wad's lost esp ch.
is something i regretted.
but here. i have to proudly mark the end of my jc term.=(

Labels: end

ok. laugh when u can.
my upper lip is swollen.
all because of two darn ulcers on it.
and the ulcers dun seem to go.
upon applying of medication, they seem to GROW.
like i'm feeding them luhh. wth.
tts why i obviously avoided sch today.
i wun wish to scare everyone.
or u can say i'm vain.
i wun go to sch in tt manner.=(
hope it would be loads better tmr.
it seem to be better today le.=/
and it was again another unproductive day at home.
the darn neighbour upstairs luhh.
DRILLED THE WHOLE DAY.
omg. damn NOISY.
i can sleep la. woke up freaking early.
and my mood for the day ruined.
DRILL DRILL N DRILL.
can seriously go mad. ><


i really wonder when i'm so NICE.
i can even call to offer help.
sounds so extra right?
i DID it. n reality came in. i got snubbed.
i deserved it.

studying kills.
seemed like i really lost my momentum.
it seems like now is nt the time for this.
but i have to really work hard.
i've been feeling extra tired these days.
even thou i nv do much. zzz.
like my stamina falling.
feeling like i'm gna fall real sick soon.
hang on edmund. ><

Labels: SICK

my 401th post.
amazing. i stuck to this for so long alr.
although my blogging habits are nt regular.
but kinda proud of this achievement.
worked ytd for purple sage.
kinda long time since i worked.
my body stiff n sore after the work.
did stewarding. piece of cake to me=)
haha. so bhb, but i managed.
needa save more money for prom=/


Lance Armstrong
If you ever get a second chance in life for something, you've got to go all the way.

how good if there can be second chances?
sadly it is difficult to see it in reality.
second chances are hard to come by.
a friendship lost nv returns.
an exam done nv reversed.
a relationship once bnroken nv the same as b4.
a wrong step in life usually have no u-turn.
but on a lighter note.
we still see second chances in life.
but seriously, hold it tight.
n go all the way.


my life lacks of second chances.=(

Labels: second chance

paranoia. when things u dun know.
i really start to doubt.
doubts come from suspicions.
but shouldn't there be trust?
i really don know.
this simply gives me a headache.
but it cant be left alone.
juz enlighten me.



the freaking weather kills.

Labels: HOT

the weather. sucks totally.
cant stand it.believe it or nt.
the weather spoils one mood.
especially when ur mood is alr bad enuf to start wif.
back to reality.
all results came back alr.
mostly finalised i suppose.
but it only shows me failure.
failure to even maintain my grades.
thus resulting in a series of poor grades.
i suppose its juz too hard to hide this disappointment.


when friends use love as an excuse.
i dun accept it.
cuz its the balance u have to achieve.
or else.its definitely the friend tt suffers.


sounds so much like history is gonna repeat.

Labels: disappointment

when u do so much.
but people simply dun bother.
cuz they take u for granted.
they take ur existence as nth.
being treated this way,
i wonder wads the point.
forget it.
no one deserves such treatment.
let alone me.



calls ignored, concerns hecked.
nonchalant towards my help.
wad more.



Randolph S. Bourne
Friendships are fragile things, and require as much handling as any other fragile and precious thing.

Labels: break it

i'm getting impatient.
extremely impatient.
when i cant do a qn, i feel pissed.
nt becuz the qn is difficult.
is becuz i dun have the ability to do it.
sounds warped. but its true.
prelim results back.
sucks on the average.
i cant even bother to type it out.
wonder how i can survive the As.
guess its nt time to lament.
no time to be emotional.
there's barely enough to get back the momentum.



suddenly, i felt it gets troublesome to help people.
when u wanna help, u still have to accomodate to them.
shouldn't it be the other way round?
where people receiving your help be accomodating?
what a world i'm living in now. self-centred.


The heart holds answers the brain refuses to see.
~Kall

Labels: self-centred

utterly stumped.
or should i say i expected tt coming.
failed my econs.
did terribly. 42. pathetic.
i simply duno how to do well for it.
this is the prelims.
n this is wad i'm getting.
i studied extra hard for it.
cuz i knew i simply suck at it.
all the extra effort went down the drains.
i cant even PASS.
nth more to say.


when i approached u.
i simply need a pair of ears.
but none of u are around.







GOOD friends. wad a joke.

Labels: failed

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