ohhhhh.
wtf. econs was dumb.
the qns for essay was juz the dumb model essay similar.
so i practically wasted my nite.
how i wished i juz knew.
n studied juz the relevant crap.
but nvm las.its ok.
when i saw the qns in the paper.
i was like O.O!!
kinda like attained econs enlightenment!!
hahhaaha. i think i'm really mad.
dunno why. i juz feel stupid all of a sudden.
sian. thats maybe all of my slacking results.
i feel super inconfident in within.
but no one knows.=(

why muz i all of sudden feel this way?
like this so inconfident? so insecure?
am i abt to lose it all? i really cant think of it.
i wun be able to accept this total defeat.
i think i would really fall hard if i fail.
i cant n i couldn't.
wad can i do?can someone tell me?

PROMOS.
terror can. promos is here.
found out that i've cocked up the first two papers.
zzz. GP as usual.
DISASTROUS. i chose an unknown topic.
i think i'm really mad.
found out wad a mad choice i made.
its promos n i play like tat.=(
chinese was unusually tough.
haha. higher standards this time round.
should nt be that tough for me./
bt the paper made me realise somethn.
my chinese has deproved.
SIAN! n tmr is wtf econs.
some h1 that i took.
i wonder why i took it.
so the damn boring n hard to revise.
feeling fk up.
how cocky can ppl get?
i will win u!
we will wait n see,
who will have the last laugh.

i need the strength.
i need the determination.
i need the courage.
but how on earth to get it?
i'm still thinking bout it..
i am starting to waver.
unsure, uncertain,
if the step forward is right or not.

why are there so many ppl thinking this way?
its juz right b4 promos n ppl are thinkin of transfers to poly-.-
or some even thyinking of retaining.
its juz the last step to the end of J1,
why for give up! NO! win over ur JC LIFE!=)

10 REASONS why u should stay in JC or promote:

1. there is life in JC! its juz up to u!
2. poly does not guarantee freedom.
3. u get to wear uniform in JC!
4. u're definitely closer wif ur frens in jc.
5. juz end ur studying wif the remaining one yr!
6. u wun want to waste ur one yr in jc n take another 3 more yrs in poly!=/
7. u will miss everything in JC!
8. there is more than wad meets to the eye in poly.
9. JC life provide u wif thinking time to mature n settle finally for ur best choice of ur uni course.
10. LAST OF ALL... hmm. U PPL CANT SEE ME IN POLY-.- haha!

The MUGGING Season.
OMG. i found no one alive nowadays.
everyone is so busy wif one thing.
MUGGING.
something i seriously hate.
haha. coz i dun mug.
i study smart.
studying wif understanding do save alot more time,
compared to mugging.
so i choose the faster way out!
but i'm still so slacking.
i'm starting to wonder y everyone is working so hard.
for gd results in promos?
zzz. that should be it.hahaha.
i've been seriously slacking like mad.
n this is bad..promos how?><

juz when i said i have no one to talk to,
juz when i felt no one understands,
juz as i wanted to give up,
wanted to fall n nv pick up,
U all appeared.
to motivate me to move on.
n not to give up or lose out!=)

should i give up or not?

random.
ahhhhhs!
why isit that promos is here
n i'm still so free!
argh! still blogging more oftne than usual-.-
hais. slacking for the day le.
sianZZ.. juz hate exams=/
cant go anywhr!
i wan play pool!!=(
zzz. now i've to go back to my realm of studying=(
will be back later=)

STUDYING SMART NOT MUGGING!!
nah.i only study smart.
NOT MUG!
hehe. thats my mentality.
lol.n yq said it many times today:
i wan to beat S13!
lol!wad a strong ambition!
all the best to her!
though i fell that might fall short=/
n i studied in sch today!
till7 lols.
first part of the day spent on the second mock.
this time i produced alot better results.
barely scraped anA.hehe.
n later went makan wif ah meng suwen n yueqi
n went back to sch to cont studying.
n also got PIG NIC n aiting to pei us.
n i got forced to eat fishballs by nic!><
so evil! stuffed the fishball at me!
hahaha. gained quite alot today bahhs.

but somethn really irritated me.
almost couldn't control myself in class.
ZZzz. but i still calmed down.
i would nt bother.
i should nt care n everything may be fine?.

TIRED.
OMG. i am coughing like mad now.
fk la. how am i gonna take my promos like tat?
ARGH. n now is definitely nt the time to stop.
how to continue aft that lo.
i really wanna have good rests.
but unfortunately no.
i've only been slpin for 3 out of 5 days this week.
n the days i slpt for like the most 3 hours.
but all my slp is broken las.
keep waking up to sneeze, cough,
or sometimes is juz cant slp.
so wad is promos man?
hais. why am i still so tired out?

maybe i'm wrong again.
i'm juz too foolish to think of winning.
i'm juz too incompetent.
but i really hate hypocrites.

Hopes.
found out i've been back to my consistent blogging!
Lol. wad a time-.-
juz rite b4 promos.ARGH.
juz like 8 more days to DOOM.
although i keep trying to relax.
but it seems that i'm really panicking.
first time in my life seh.
have to think so much for an exam.
maybe is my class over competitive le bahh.
n i dun like being looked down on.
especially when i can do it better than them.
or maybe nt? i'm also nt sure.
but for sure,
i'm gonna study hard for promos.
nt slacking.=(
kinda odd. like so nt me.
like i've really changed in jc.
i did change bahh.
but at least i'm still trying my best to be myself.

i need the endurance.
i need the determination.
coz i'm nt gonna lose out.=)

(s)sometimes when i doubt.
i doubt who to find.
i found no one actually.
to really talk to bahh.(/s)

ARGH!
STUPID FLU! GO AWAY!
kena flu bug again.
zzz. super sian diao.
n juz ate two panadol down.
but cant go to slp><
have to pia through physics today.
found out theres no end man.
after PW, now physics.
OMG. i really tired out.
two days without slp le.
how to survive?
SAVE ME.

FALLING.
yep yep. i'm falling in n deep.
into the abyss of 'JC life.
imagine juz being threatened for -ve remarks in ur report carD?
WTF la.
so calculative for wad.
as if i only study those subjects only.-.-
ok. ignore that.
i dun wan spoil my mood-.=
yepp. juz that 10 more days to the freaking promos.
feelin awfully regretful.
keep gt ppl ask me why u no exemption.
to amplify the damage on me><
ok. i'm nt studious for any sake.
i'm a super slacker.
n its nt i'm cocky.
but i juz went through J1 without diligence,
but intelligence.
doin the minimum only^^
slacking at the maximum.
hahas. sounds darn cocky laas.
btu thats the truth.O.O
not like my class ppl.
no life lo. study n study.
WTH. thats not life.
i live my life to the fullest.
but also wif my work n studies nt at sake.
thats my aim!=)

i really have no more time n energy to think abt other stuff le.
so let all the feelings step down till promos end.
ignorance again.
but this time i presume it to be a wise choice.=(

TIME IS EVERYTHING.

Isolation.
this blog like dead le lea.
no one is really taggingT.T
nv mind.
i shall still diligently update.
tok abt today first bahh.
today woke up super early.=(
juz to go school for olympiad training.
OHH. WTH!
the stupid teacher cancelled the session!
make me wake up so early larr!
dun like him lo-.-
buden had to take the notes home n read.
the note look so physics-.=
thermodynamics..zZz.
den brought laptop to sch.
do PW=( alone...
super sian.
kena PS by all my kuku grp members lo.
they all came so late.
den i poor thing.
alone pia PW.
like some idiot-.-
did PW frm like 9 till 5?
OMG! its like 8 hours lo.
buden still nt yet all done.
sian larr. really dun like lo.
waste all my time.
den today morning i got a special task-.-
wake nic up. nicholas tan.
he super funny la.
ask me call him at 8 to wake him up.
zzz. den i so kind. called him.
only got to him at 820?O.o
den he told me he gt the time wrong!-.-
piggish him wan go back slp awhile.
n asked me to call him back at 910..
!! but i so teng him, so still called.
n den he woke up-_-lols.
so kuku=P
oh yar!not to forget..
i also had a fruitful conversation wif desmond today.
hehe. he is bitchy lo! ROFL.
but found out there are other perspectives.
to a single problem.
i seen it.

nahh. really doubt myself these days.
really felt hypoctitical. XU WEI
kinda isolated some times.
come to think of it.
but usually i choose nv to think of it.
but why for?
i should be myself.
FACE IT BOY!
maybe its time to be myself.
face the fact.
i do feel isolated at times.
friends distanced in other schools.
frens attached.
frens i'm uncertain of.
hypcrites.
there are indeed times i cheated myself.
denied it.
but why muz i be reminded then?
thats still nt that bad.
n why muz someone rub it in?
i cant stand it.
So juz STFU.

UPDATES.
finally realised that i've nt been blogging for long.
so here's my update!
hehe. so long sionce i really came to update ler..
so whr should i start?
hais.
sian bahh.
juz too tired for updates.
no time to tidy my blog.
hols juz passed.
but sama no hols like tat.
all spent on work mainly.
din really go out.
except on teacher's day?
went town wif nic n yq.
had alot of fun though.hehe.=/
den did pooled abit laas.
nt as gd as b4.=X
din really seriously play also bahh.
mainly juz for fun=)

ok.now back to serious stuffs.
school work-.-
pw is WTF la.
real troublesome.
alot to do for it.
when it is juz a nt so useful H1 subject.
n promos in 15days to go.
nt really prepared yet!!><
sian larr.
i wan to do well n i need to!
so i shall=)

bad feeling wif my sixth sense these days.
the losing feeling.
feels v weird wif it.
i dun wanna lose anymore.
no way i can stand such torment once more..

QUOTE: IF U THINK U CAN, U CAN! For Nic Di! =)

• -=|Ed[M]und|=-
  18081989
  LeO
  BAD Attitude
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